The way it goes

So this morning I was struck with a bad case of nausea (morning sickness), I almost died...

So I work on a system now, before I get out of bed I lay there for a while just so everything can settle before I attempt the big move.
Just minutes after I moved a few muscles I find myself reaching for the bucket, that somehow has made its way out of my room... OMG i freaked out...

First thought: Lord help me sneak pass "OH SHIT" (thats my momma), thats the hardest you know... if you hiding your pregnancy from the most important people...
3 reasons why I have to...
1. She'll kill me
2. She'll kill me and most importantly
3. She'll kill me...
and thats only my mother... what happens when "DEEP SHIT" (my dad) finds out.
The speech would probably be something like...
"I told you to stay away from that boy, look what you did, how could you, your career is ruined, with a few other "french" words inbetween...
Wait thats all besides the point now...

So after the first thought right, I head for the passage that seemed to be as long as the Berlin Wall at that moment for me...

I tip toe all the way down, lay flat on the cold tiled floor as I near the parents bedroom, I slide my way right pass without even a lil peep...

WOOHOO... I survived the predators...

So by now Im like really smiling, only a few more feet till I can relieve all this pressure boiling in my throat...

As i reach the bathroom I do my lil two step happy dance swing open the door only to find "David Beckham" (lil bro) doing his thing...

What now huh what now???

I curse him for a few seconds, but realise that Im about to barf... Next best option... Outdoor loo...

As much as I hate using the outbuildings loo, desperate times call for desperate measures right?

I fly through the kitchen door, out back and still have to deal with the big mutt my Beckham calls his dog.. By now Im half choking...

I finally reach my destination... and to save ya'll from all the gory details, I'll just say I almost died.

If I could honestly skip this stage I'd be able to keep my pregnancy invisible for quite some time...

What I remember!

I remember the day i met u...da circumstances surrounding this meeting turned from mourning 2 something we regarded as a blessing, boi were we blessed!

I remember how we ended up together, stil something we all laugh about, i remember when we first kissed, the shocking realisation that i would rather kiss u 4 the rest of my life amused me.

I remember the day u told me u loved me...i ran in the opposite direction,literally...

I remember the good times...the times when we laughed,fooled around,and just enjoyed what we had found within eachother.i remember the bad times more, they strengthened me...u...us,thats when i concluded that id rather have bad times with u than any1 else.

I remember u calling me beautiful instead of hot,i remember how u whispered u loved me in the middle of a crowd, i remember the years we spent learning 2 understand one another instead of just walking away,i remember the trials,the memories,the fact that no1 else could replace u.

I remember how u won me over, although i wish u hadnt.

I remember mostly how u hurt me, i remember all the tears i shed, i remember the things u said and did, i remember how u changed, how i barely knew u anymore, how ud rather be away than with me...

I remember us falling apart, the good times were no longer in sight and the previous bad times didnt come close 2 the tornadoes sweepin thru my heart

Ur existance just a mirage, a figure of what was but no longer is, ur once alluring self assuring smile no longer comforted my fears...u have turned into a being not worthy of my priceless love...

AND THIS IS WHAT I'LL REMEMBER!!!

It starts here

So here I am... wanna know lil bout the "title", well "Its all his fault" thats all i can say...lol..

22 knocked up by the ex who is totally inlove with himself and believes he is the only gift God gave women...

I joke not... ask around. He thinks of himself as the highest note in a chord, the blackest berry in the bush and the sweetest tasting lemon around...

Ok I dont wanna spend all this time talking about him, but since he's partly the reason im here, gotta give the dude some credit know.

So well here how it goes... he knocks me up... leaves... carries on with his petty life, and im here with the growing baby, dont get me wrong, I love this lil baby inside of me, and im super excited to have her (yes it will be a girl), I just somehow wanted things to be different, for him to have smelt the coffee by now and just given all of him to us, but that was just wishful thinking.

So ive embarked on my new life.. with me, my baby and me... As the song says Miss Independant right? Well, its the 21st century, whats wrong with being a single mom and achieving your goals and supporting your baby by yourself? I say nothing... its an honour!

Geez that all sounds like a hate speech against the ex, but I swear its not, its all about my baby and growing independance...